------------ WARNING!!! I HAVE A TENDENCY TO KILL MY FAVORITE CHARACTERS IN MY FANFICTION'S-----------
YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...
*You talk to yourself a lot.
*You talk to yourself about talking to yourself.
*When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else.
-After uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, "Wow, this stuff is great for sugar highs..."
*You live off of sugar and caffeine
*People think you're insane.
-You'll check your e-mail every day of the week one week, and then disappear off the face of the earth the next.
-You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.
-When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.
-No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.
-The letters on your keyboard are wearing off.
-Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome.
*People think you have A.D.D.
*You think it'd be cool to have A.D.D.
*You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.
*You start thinking about making lists like this and start laughing for no "apparent" reason
*Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.
-And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101.
Copy that into you're profile if you fit one or more of the descriptions
How You Know You’re Addicted to Yaoi/Slash:
- You start mentally pairing up random guys on the street.
- You wish you had gay friends just so you could perve on them kissing their boyfriends.
- You don’t remember the last time you read a heterosexual fanfiction.
- You have developed a sexual fetish for handcuffs, leather and BDSM.
- If you are a heterosexual girl, you keep trying to seme your boyfriend, despite the fact that you don’t have the necessary parts.
- You suddenly become interested in gay rights, thinking this will increase your opportunities for voyeristic activities.
- You try to get your friends into it, simply so you can talk to them about it without them getting that bored look on their face.
- You keep lying about the number of hours you spend each day on the computer reading slash fanfiction, watching yaoi anime etc.
- The most exiting moment of your life so far was when you discovered hentai manga.
- You celebrate turning 18 not because you can watch R movies, but because you’re old enough to watch movies with explicit gay sex scenes.
- It’s the only aphrodesiac you need.
- When your boyfriend tells you he’s gay and has been dating another man, you immediately ask if you can join in.
- Your gay son wishes he had a normal, homophobic mother who didn’t ask him questions about his latest sexual exploits.
If you’re reading this and nodding to yourself, post it on your profile page. I LOVE YAOI!!!!!!
----10 Commandments of a Teenager----
1. Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping. (why wait that long)
2. Thou shall not do drugs. (alcohol lasts longer, not to mention being cheaper)
3. Thou shall not steal from K-mart. (Walmart has a bigger selection)
4. Thou shall not be arrested for vandalism. (destruction has a bigger effect, I can tell you all about this)
5. Thou shall not steal from your parents. (everyone knows grandma has more money)
6. Thou shall not get into fights. (Can't fight anyhow...just start them)
7. Thou shall not skip class. (just take the whole day off)
8. Thou shall not strip in class. (Hooters pays more.)
9. Thou shall not think about having sex. (like Nike says, "Just do it.")
10. Thou shall not help old ladies across the street. (just leave em' in the middle)
Sometimes I feel like I'm dying of over yaoi exposure... this is one of those days.
Me: *walks into room with only a towel on*
Sarah & Daniel: *quickly hide under covers on my bed*
Bailey: *hide in closet*
Me: *sits on bed (Sarah's leg) and sighs* Why did you follow me home?
Sarah: *muffled voice* We came to give you back you ID card! *sticks ID out the top of the covers
Me: But that's not all, is it?
Daniel: ... not really
Me: So wheres your other friend?
Sarah & Daniel: In the closet
Me: *no megusta*
Check this out...
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.
The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid.
Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.
The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!
If you could read that put it in your profile!
MY REACTION WHEN I SEE DEAD PEOPLE
Dead person: Hello!
Me: ... *stare*
dead person: ... what? Is There something on my face?
Me: *looks at person, looks around, looks back at person* Aren't you supposed to be dead?
Dead person: hahaha, funny you should ask... Long story.
Me: Oh and by the way, abot the earliesr question....
Dead person: Yes?
Me: Your ear felll off
Dead Person: FUCK! NOT AGAIN!
Mukuro: Before we set off to capture 2 of the most infamous criminals in the mafia, wouldn't you like a cup of hot chocolate?
Hibari: Piss off!
Maybe I shouldn't have drove home from the bar... especially since I walked there..."
If someone throws a rock at you, throw a flower back at them, but, make sure the flower is still in the pot!
I love competing in sporting events. But I think I have a problem with that silver medal. You win the gold, you feel good; you win the bronze, you think "Well, at least I got something." But when you win the silver its like "Congratulations! You ALMOST won!"
Don't play stupid with me. I'm better at it.
I know I'm not perfect, but I'm so close it scares me!
No ones perfect. Well... there was this one guy.. But we killed him.
I'm so great. I'm jealous of myself
I am not anti-social.. I just don't like you.
I think...therefore I am dangerous.
I'm tough, ambitious and know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch, okay.
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
I think of lying as creative "truth-making".
It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.
I'm not arrogant. Arrogance is a flaw. I have no flaws.
Smile -- it confuses the enemy
I'm not bossy, I just have better ideas
Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.
Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.
Kaito: All right, men! Our next target is this man, Kamui Gakupo. He is commandor of Army Fangirl-- Unit Japan. Also a samuri, a rumored Vampire, and our newest sourses say he has obtained a big, black dragon.
What is our position, Commandor Len?
Len: We're screwed...
Kaito: Well, what about you, Rin?
Rin: Im not facing him!
Kaito: We'll, alright. We still have our secret weapon...Luka!
Random officer: Um...Luka has joined Gakupo...
Kaito: FUCK IT.
Frua: Here you go kids, the world is a dangeruos place with perverts like Ayanami~ This pepper spray works quite well, I just tested them~ *hands can's to Mikage and Hakuren*
Teito: FRUA WHY IS THERE SOMEONE SCREAMING ON THE FRONT PORCH!!!
Jerks 'R' Us
Me: *walks into lampost* OW!!!
Caitlin: The hell were you trying to do?!
Me: Last I remember, walking. Y'know walking? That thing you do with your feet? ~First, you lift your right foot, put it down. ~Then, you lift your left foot, put it down.
Caitlin: Yeah, but why'd you keep going?
Me: I didn't know I was supposed to stop.
Caitlin: Well, now you do.
Me: Big help.
"Fluffy white mattresses don't feel quite so fluffy when falling from a 3 story building, so don't do it."
And there's ur quote of the month, from Amber~
"Men, when arguing with women you must remember: correctness satisfies them."
Quote of the month from Amber~
"The shock to find an innocent boy in your bed you don't remember going to sleep with the next morning is enough to make any normal person wide awake."
Quote of the month from Amber~
I love people!!
Until someone piss me off.
If this happens, I shall kill them with (fire) kindness!!
Watchin a video featuring sekaichi hatsukoi. Background music, cannibal. Thing is...
Ritsu can't run.. cannibal lives nex door.
"HENROVERNIA!!" Not a real word I just randomly made it up and I LOVE IT~
"I'm not asleep, get out, you're too hot and melting my ice-cream," I muttered trying to protect my waffle.
Giotto: Hey Tsu, I'm sorry I didn't tell you I was your great-great-great-great-ect.-grandfather before we had sex, but forgive me and lets make like rabbits. What do you say?
Tsuna: I say… no.
Giotto: What? *shock* This is impossible! Tsuna never refuses him! It's like, one of the most important rules of the universe! Tsuna never says no to him! It's just not possible!
Giotto's ego knew no limits.
Tsuna: No matter what I won't give you guys up to anyone else
Yamamoto & Gokudera: ... o/////o *walk up to cold wall and press faces to it to stop the blush*
Yamamoto: Oi, Tsuna, how many times have we told you that… saying something like that with straight face is really… really not good for our hearts?
Tsuna: Really? *innocent face*
Gokudera: Are you trying to kill us juudaime?
Tsuna: *evil chuckle*
There is a "lie" in believe, "over" in lover, "end" in friend, and an "if" in life, there's no I in TEAM but there is an M and a E. And after Monday and Tuesday even the calendar says W.T.F.
--How Light could have gotten L's name--
Light: Me llamo es Light. Y tu? (My name is Light. And you?)
L: ... *spanish seriously* Me llamo es L. (My name is L)
Light: El...? El que? (The...? The what?)
L: ... *crap* Me llamo es... Lawliet... (My name is... Lawliet...)
--40 seconds later--
L: Ugh *dies*
Me: *sees a pineapple* Hey Marco! *points to said fruit* Look, it's your cousin!
Marco: *glares dryly* ...Hilarious
Mukuro: *burst out luaghing*
Me: What are you laughing at? *magically pulls out blue pineapple* This is your sister~
-----He Said-She said!-----
He said . . . I don’t know why you wear a bra; you’ve got nothing to put in it.
She said . . . You wear pants don’t you?
He said . . ….. Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said . That’s a good idea – you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!
He said . … What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
She said . …..Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
He said . . ….. Why don’t you tell me when you have an orgasm?
She said . . .. I would but you’re never there.
He said . ….. Why don’t women blink during foreplay?
She said . . They don’t have time
He said . . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
She said . . We don’t know; it has never happened.
He said . . Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and Good- looking?
She said …… . . They already have boyfriends.
He said…What do you call a women who knows where her husband is every night?
She said . . . A widow.
He said . .. . Why are married women heavier than single women?
She said . . . Single women come home, see what’s in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what’s in bed and go to the fridge.